ace of wands

i’ve been writing for as long as i can remember. my mother handed me a diary when i was on the cusp of my ninth birthday and i have never turned from it. i attempted novels, i wrote long skinny columns of poetry, i wrote short stories. i returned to poetry.

and then november 2016 happened. i suddenly found writing almost impossible.

all through 2017, i continued to not-really-write. i pretty much stopped submitting things for publication. i threw myself instead into planning a dungeons & dragons campaign - which is, as i said on twitter a few months ago, a really interesting lesson in putting a lot of effort into a creative endeavor with a necessarily limited audience.
so, i don’t know, the message i’m getting from the ace of wands these days is less inspiration-as-lightning-bolt and more inspiration-as-taking-it-where-you-can-find-it. it’s less romantic and it’s less the image i had of myself as a writer when i was younger, but it still feels good.

this week, darlings, let’s all be fearless about starting things we’re passionate about - let’s be full of that ace of wands energy. (in that spirit, there’s a poem after the next image. enjoy!)
persephone returns to her mother

spring comes, and i braid my hair
like a girl once more, the way my mother likes it.

i went through hell for my independence
and now i return, a grown woman pretending

that she is still a girl, that her innocence
remains intact, that she can obey.

i am my mother’s daughter, yes,
as she told me and told me and told me

in my youth. i too am crabby,
and tender. but my mother would drown me

if she could, because she has never grasped
that a boundary exists between us.

*

this week’s deck: personal space tarot