five of blooms

grief / disappointment

a girl i loved when i was sixteen once told me that my only flaw was that my hopes were as high as the stars, while everyone else was in the gutter, able to reach the sidewalk. the world would only disappoint me.

she wasn’t wrong, really. (she frequently saw the truth of me, which brought me great pleasure and also great pain.) i couldn’t or wouldn’t adjust my expectations, though. maybe the world would only disappoint me, but i’d rather find the beauty in that disappointment than settle for anything less than the stars.
the five of blooms - or cups - is a card that lives in that disappointment. in this deck the card shows five tree stumps, suggesting an emotional stunting. other versions of this card show some cups knocked over while some remain upright. (the message here tends to be: don’t dwell on what is lost; instead focus on what remains.) personally, i like the starkness of the stumps. i like their potential. after all, nature has a use for everything, even that which has been cut down.

i’ve learned to take comfort in cycles, in the natural rhythms of things. it’s good to know that everything has a fallow season.

humans are not separate from nature; we are a part of it and subject to its rhythms, too. remember to rest this week, darlings. remember that disappointment and grief have their purposes, too.

this week’s deck: the wooden tarot
this week’s plant: roses from whole foods which promptly wilted and dried up in my hothouse apartment