it’s an odd thing, surviving. i never really expected to make it to my thirties, but here i am. i wouldn’t have gotten here without my community, without my friends, without the people who love me even when it’s rotten work. (please see anne carson’s translation of elektra.)
my community has recently expanded to include some folks who are (it feels) much younger than i am, and this puts me in an interesting position. because of when i started school, i’ve always been one of the youngest people in any given group of friends. it’s new, to be the oldest - to be told that i am a role model for taking care of one’s mental health.
at least, it feels new. years ago, erin once called me a queer fairy godmother to some younger friends i had at the time, and i’ve been thinking about that a lot these days. june, as you may know, is pride month here, and i’ve been delighted to spend a lot of it with my younger queer friends. (at the festival last night, i declined to chug my beer, saying “i’m 32!” and one of them retorted, “no, you’re not!” - reader, i am.) i want them to be safe; i want them to be healthy; i want them to be happy. and if i can guide them towards those things, then i will try my hardest to do so.
the leader of cups resonated with all this when i pulled it for the newsletter - particularly because the mesquite tarot changed the court card positions. i doubt i would have resonated quite as much with a king of cups, but this figure, crowned and open, seated by the water, drew me in. they’re not forcing anything; they’re only offering the wisdom they have gained with experience.
happy pride month, my darlings, and thank you for a year of small beauties. i’m excited to see where this continues to take us.