five of cups

grief / disappointment //

the five of cups feels like a big late-pandemic mood: hope is on the horizon, some cups remain upright, and yet my brain insists on focusing on the loss. i have been so lucky, so privileged, ensconced alone in my studio apartment for the past year, and it has been so fucking hard.

this march is hard in a way last march was not; it has been a year of this and things are starting to change for other people, but not me. i don’t begrudge anyone who has been able to get vaccinated, in fact i am so happy for them, but i also need to express how hard it is to know that i won’t even be eligible for another month.

ok. now a deep breath in, and maybe let’s check in on those glasses that are still upright. let’s turn around and see that a rainbow awaits us. deep breath out. we got this, my darlings.

*

this week’s deck: sasuraibito tarot
this week’s gems: amethyst, clear quartz

*

previously, in five of cups: 8/12/18