ten of arrows

defeat / ending / loss / rock bottom / melodrama //

i drew a card - the mother of pentacles - for some dear friends who are expecting a baby in the very near future the other night, and noted that it wasn’t a card i draw for myself very often. i don’t get a lot of pentacles in general, i said. (of course, i drew the same card the next morning, because i think my tarot deck has a sense of humor about these things.)

but swords? arrows? plumes? whatever they’re called in a deck, that’s my suit. it’s where i feel most at home. the suit is ruled by air, just as my sun sign, libra, is. i have always been a girl who lived a little too much in her own head, making stories like trapdoors to escape reality.

i have also, of course, always been a girl who has struggled with anxiety and depression. i’ve mentioned before that it’s easy to associate swords with these ways the mind can turn against itself.

the ten of swords - or arrows, in this case - is one of those cards that i think people dread seeing, for just that reason. but i must confess that i love this card, that it makes me laugh whenever i pull it for myself.

part of this is because it’s so dramatic! that’s so many arrows! too many arrows! part of this is because every time i pull it, i think, “congratulations! the swords have chosen you!” (from this amazing literal tarot reading by daniel ortberg. fun fact: in the comments, i predicted that i would think of that every time i pulled the card, and I WAS RIGHT.)

on a more serious note, though, i pulled it for my daily card about a month ago, and wrote: “i find this comforting, honestly - the idea that i can (and have) survived the ravages of my own brain. there’s no where to go but up.” what i love about tarot is that there is no card that is either good or bad; each card contains both and the interpretation is up to the reader.

this week, darlings, try to remember that sometimes what is needed is just a shift of perspective. sometimes there’s no where to go but up.

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this week’s deck: mesquite tarot
this week’s crystals: amethyst, tiger’s eye